We received THE e-mail. You know... The one informing us we need to update all our paperwork. I whined on facebook, I whined to my mother, I whined to my husband, and now I'm whining to all of you. I DON'T WANT TO DO IT!!!!!! There, much better.
For those who may not know, our dossier expires after two years from arriving in Ethiopia. Prior to that expiration we're required to update everything. I do mean EVERYTHING!
I was actually surprised about the maturity with which I was handling it for the first couple of hours. I was whiny, sure, but I was also rather organized printing out the list, posting it on the fridge, and e-mailing our agency. I was very methodical and calm. Then I e-mailed two of our references for new letters. Isn't it odd the things that set you off?
I was writing this e-mail asking them if they would write new letters and tears start prickling my eyes. Next thing I know I can feel one lightly hit my cheek. It never went beyond a few tears sliding down my face, but it felt momentous. I don't want to be all melodramatic about the whole thing, but it feels like a big deal. It was a big deal to do it all the first time, why wouldn't it be the second time? As you can see, I'm still in a relatively whiny place.
The one thing that brightened all of this for me was this line:
It is still possible that we will be in the position to present you with a referral before your dossier expires, and the updated documents will not be necessary. However, we have no way of knowing for sure if a referral for your family will come in time.
Our board meeting minutes came yesterday as well and they are signing on a new orphanage which is fantastic news! I can't help but feel hopeful our referral may come sooner than later. The thing about hope though is that it's not always a good thing. I'll do more on that at a later date, but I think those of you who've dealt with infertility will probably understand how hope can become a double edged sword.
I'm off today to acquire more paper cuts and spend more money! It's all good though, because I know my child is worth a million paper cuts, a million tears, and a million heartaches. They are worth all of that and much much more.
Have a lovely Thursday,
Jessalyn Hope (I bet you didn't know Hope is actually my middle name) ♥
Ps. My Salt review is coming up tomorrow!
Image from http://carolsgarden.blogspot.com/2009/01/vintage-valentine-tinsel-hearts.html