Monday, May 30, 2011

Pretty things amoung my pity party

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I'm going to try and at least do one blog post a week just to keep me inspired. I've been looking for my inspiration lately so this is probably a good place to start! I'm working again which means I'm a bit more tired but relieved to get out of the house. I'm also trying to find my way still. I guess all in all I feel pretty lost these days.

The last few weeks have been a bit rough as change is rarely easy, at least for me. I'm like an 80 year old dog who doesn't want to learn new tricks and is just happy with a good bed and enough fiber in his diet. Stagnant one might say, but I think of it as consistent. Still, I'm not quite 80 so I should probably embrace change just a teeny tiny bit more.

The thing about work though is the reality that keeps slapping me in the face. 4 years ago when I started at this job we were beginning our adoption from Liberia and we were very optimistic. Now we sit here four years later and 31 months of our dossier being in Ethiopia and it seems there is still no end in sight. I'm truthfully losing hope. I'm not excited when the phone rings, in fact I rarely even get up to see who's calling. Pregnancy announcements gut me even more than they used to and all in all I feel despondent.

My biggest refuge of late has been a fantastic website called Pinterest that a very creative friend linked me to. The above are my favourite pictures from there that make me smile and breathe a little easier.

I just wish there was a way to know that one day we will be parents and the unfortunate truth of the matter is there is no guarantee that will happen. Hope can be a double edged sword some days.

J xx